To my lovely new friends here in Blog Land – I hope you all have a wonderful new year in 2012, that you are happy, healthy, positive, lucky, everything you desire/need happens for you.
I have a deep unshakeable feeling that 2012 is going to be really positive for me and Shalimar – it’s definitely going to start with a new beginning. We move to our new home in just a few days – on Wednesday!
Even so, my feeling of better things on the horizon is strong.. and comforting.
In 2012 I want to focus on being KIND to myself, and on SELF-CARE. For too many years – most of my life – I’ve been just horrible to myself. My eating disorder is very much based in self loathing. Part of the journey to recovery is finding the love, care and RESPECT to really start looking after myself properly, nourishing myself, letting myself THRIVE instead of trying to suffocate myself like a weed.
Even if I AM a weed – Weeds are but plants in the wrong place, aren’t they? And maybe this new home will be the place I’m meant to be in.
By default, kindness and self-care will mean I can be kinder and more caring towards others too – you cannot give to others what you have not first given to yourself.
I also want to learn how to just BE. To live in the moment. Yesterday is gone – we cannot control it, cannot change it. Tomorrow is out of reach. I want to live RIGHT NOW as best and fully as I can. And if I can do that, tomorrow will actually be that much better in a flow-on effect.
Being able to just BE will help, I think, with anxiety, with flashbacks, with all sorts of things. With accepting my body, that I AM, that I don’t ever have to apologise for being who I AM. That it’s okay to be the way I AM and that I don’t have to try and change it and be something else.
It’s been a hard decade, a hard couple of decades, so to have things start to just be okay and calm and positive will be a dream come true.
Here’s to fresh new positive beginnings for all of us. Happy New Year, my friends!
What are you doing to see the New Year in? (I’m staying home).
What do you want the New Year to hold for you? Resolutions? Hopes? Dreams? I hope they happen for you xx