Just to say I haven’t gone AWOL, and I am working on my hospital post/s. How do you fit fifteen years of pretty much living at the hospital more than in your own home, into a blog? How do you condense all that down so that it’s not boring, not overly long, not too hard to take? Where do you even start?
I’m writing – I’ve written heaps already, but it’s going to be a LOT to read, even broken up into installments. These are the hardest years of my life – harder than the abuse that broke me in that hell hole I called ‘home’ as a child – because I was trapped in that hospital with my demons, and my worst nightmares coming true. Fighting both myself, and those who fought me. Fighting mostly to die, and begging them to just let me do so, just let me die and stop tormenting me.
I’m very grateful they never gave up on me, I owe them my life today. Some of them have said to me they still aren’t sure it was the right thing to do – keeping me alive even when it seemed often that it was crueller than the dying would have been – but I’m here, and I’ve been giving another chance to live. That’s a gift very few would ever have. But I am traumatised from my experiences, and often it seemed that I came out of there a much more broken person than I went in.
I won’t be publishing these accounts tonight, or even tomorrow most likely, but they are definitely on their way – thank you for your patience.
In the meantime, Icanhascheezburger is more your bet for pics like the one below